Mother’s Have It So Easy—Wrong!
May 10, 2009 by Marianne H. Donley in category ArchivesBy Nancy Farrier
My mother had it so easy. While I went to school and did chores, she was a stay at home Mom with nothing to do. Sure she cooked meals, did laundry, and a few household chores, but what’s so hard about that? I knew that most of the work around the house and farm fell to my sister’s and me. At least, that’s the way I viewed life growing up.
Then I became a Mom. Suddenly, I understood what kept my mother so busy. Cleaning house doesn’t happen in a few minutes. I found out it can be hard, tiring work. Cook, laundress, dishwasher, organizer, taxi driver, arbitrator of fights, and teacher are only a few of the hats my mother wore. I found that to understand and appreciate a mother’s role, I have to be one, or to be very observant. What looked simple carried an underlying degree of difficulty some will never realize.
I don’t know how many times I’ve had people say something about how easy it is to write a book. How hard can it be? You get an idea and you write it down, right? They have no concept of how character, plot, and setting interact, and that doesn’t even include the finer intricacies of developing a story that makes sense to someone other than the writer.
Many people also believe that once you’ve written the book, the volume should be on the shelves of the bookstore the following week. The editing process is a complete mystery to them; they don’t see the number of people, or the work, involved in making your book available to them. Only those in the publishing industry, or those who take the time to be aware of the process, truly know what’s involved.
Mothers and writers have this in common. Their job is not as effortless as it looks. Yet, as both a mother and a writer, I would not give either one up. I love being both. So, I’d like to say thanks to my mother for doing her job without complaint, and for teaching me to be gracious to those who think what I do is so easy.
THINGS THAT MAKE ME GO MMMRUH!
May 8, 2009 by A Slice of Orange in category Archives tagged as Things That Make Me Go Mmmruh
17 Again. Okay, so I went to see the movie twice so far. The plot is riddled with nonsensical gaps, but there’s still plenty of mmmruh to keep me pleasantly distracted for the 102 minutes or so. And sure, the idea intrigues scores of us: if I could do it all over, with what I know now… But the truth is, I wouldn’t be 17 again, not for all the condoms in the vending machine.
Low riders and thongs? So not me. But I remember myself at 17, trying to latch onto any fashion craze I could afford. So I am sure if I got zapped back to high school I’d be squeezing into a G-string for prom. Plus, I had no confidence as a teen and my dating life limped along, hobbled by my bruised psyche. Get this – when I was 17, I dated guys who didn’t love animals!!! And drove gas guzzlers!!! Sure, I was 4 sizes smaller, but what difference does that make? I still felt fat all the time. I was in better shape, but back then my shin splints hurt like hell. And in ’89, I was on the pill, an aspect of Western medicine I’ve completely eschewed since that stroke in ’96.
Truth is, I like the person I’ve evolved into. I’m not done chasing my dreams or shy about conjuring up new ones to pursue. Mmmruh! Sure, I’ve made some mistakes along the way – I think of the chances I should have taken, the houses I didn’t buy, the vaccinations I should have never allowed – but I would not go back. Well, maybe back to that day in the vet’s office. Yes, definitely back there. But other than that, I like my thirties A LOT. Recently, I tutored a college senior, and his place where we studied smelled like college boys. Not a bad smell, just distinctive and immediately recognizable. Oh yeah, and the room was decorated with beer – signs, bottles, cans, posters. AND I WAS SO GLAD I WAS NOT IN COLLEGE ANYMORE. I am also way grateful no longer to be in my twenties. God, was I stupid in my twenties!
You know, I did not go to my 5th, 10th or 15th high school reunions. Why would I? High school was mostly unhappy for me. Plus, I am not the super in-shape best-selling novelist I hoped to be by age 25. But then Jason Smith, a kid from my high school class who is organizing our upcoming reunion, tracked me down through this very OCC Romance Writers’ Blog. He told me about our upcoming reunion and invited me to join our 20th Reunion Website.
Aaaahhh!!!!! But I’m not super in-shape!! I’m not a best-selling novelist!! I haven’t even fucked anyone famous!! I can’t go back!
But Jason worked so hard to find me, and I remembered him as such a nice kid, so I joined the website.
And oh, my goodness gracious! Would you believe that all those kids from my graduating class – we all just grew up to be people! People!! With whom it wasn’t scary at all to reconnect. In fact, catching up with my updated past has been fantastic!
For the first time in my life, I feel completely comfortable in my own skin. Mmmruh! I feel good. I feel right. And all I had to do was face one of my greatest fears – THE KIDS FROM HIGH SCHOOL!!! (You should be hearing the Psycho shower scene music in your head right now.) So now I am going to face another of my shark-eating-me-in-the-ocean-at-night-type fears (cue the Psycho strings.): SENDING MY BOOK OUT TO PUBLISHERS AND AGENTS!!!!!!
I’m going to do it, damn it, and sell my book. Mmmmmruh!
Though our winsome blogger has resigned herself to the stupid loss of her 200 bucks(see her Jnauary’09 blog), she is gratified to see that possible misuse of said 200 bucks is under federal investigation. Other than throwing her money away, Geralyn also appears in the award-winning internet short comedy film Daryl From OnCar and co-hosts the radio show Better Times After 50 on AdviceRadio.com Her short story “Jane Austen Meets the New York Giants†is published in the New York Times Bestselling anthology The Right Words at the Right Time, Volume 2.
So Many Writers’ Events, So Little Time!
May 6, 2009 by Linda O. Johnston in category Pets, Romance & Lots of Suspense by Linda O. Johnston, Writing Conferences tagged as Berkley Prime Crime, Linda O. Johnston, Pets, Silhouette Nocturne
April was especially busy with events relating to books–partly, but not entirely, because of the publication of my seventh Kendra Ballantyne, Pet-Sitter mystery NEVER SAY STY. I did some signings for STY and also gave a talk at the Writers of Kern.
More recently, I attended both days of the Los Angeles Times Festival of Books, signing at a couple of booths and also sitting at the Mystery Writers of America booth to promote the organization.
I also attended the Melody of Words, an event at a local high school to encourage students and members of the community to read… and write. It was a lot of fun, too.
I usually attend Malice Domestic around now, an event celebrating cozy mysteries that’s held in Washington, D.C., followed by an event hosted by the Mystery Lovers Bookstore near Pittsburgh, PA, where I grew up. However, this year my older son and daughter-in-law were visiting L.A. from Chicago on the same weekend, and since RWA National is also in D.C. this year I didn’t necessarily need two visits there so close together. So, I stayed home and had a great time with family.
Next month, the local chapters of Mystery Writers of America and Sisters in Crime are co-hosting the California Crime Writers Conference, which I’m looking forward to.
And I of course love to attend OCC meetings! I’ve had to miss some lately because of some signings and other events–and the June meeting does, unfortunately, conflict with the California Crime Writers Conference.
You’d think I wouldn’t have time to write with all these meetings and events going on… But somehow I manage!
What are your favorite writers’ events?
Linda O. Johnston
http://www.lindaojohnston.com/
http://www.killerhobbies.blogspot.com/
Linda O. Johnston is the author of 15 romance novels and several novellas, including a current Nocturne Bites, with 2 more Nocturnes upcoming. She also writes the Kendra Ballantyne, Pet-Sitter mystery series from Berkley Prime Crime.
Notes from Val’s Desk
May 3, 2009 by A Slice of Orange in category Archives tagged as Notes From Val's Desk, Procrastination
So, in a determined effort to “get a grip” on my time, today’s post will be brief. I removed my favorite kitty-face magnet (the first layer) and six or seven scraps of paper floated down, landing in a random pattern on my already cluttered desktop. The first message, boldly printed on a scrap of neon-orange scratch paper, reads: Print signs for OCC meeting. Here’s another, quickly scrawled on a snippet of pattern tissue: Finish hem on sundress. Number three: Work on event page for June.
Oh, here’s a good one, actually written with a gold gel pen on a glossy scrap of magazine paper: Work on writer’s block! Okay, I have to be honest. This is not the typical “writer’s block†you may be familiar with. This is an on-going craft project using a 4†x 4†cube of unfinished wood.
I think I’ll tackle this one first. But first, I have to get all these notes off my desk…..I need room.
(Maybe I’ll post a picture next month.)
The Artist’s Way
April 29, 2009 by A Slice of Orange in category The Artist Way by Gillian Doyle tagged as Artist's Way, Gillian Doyle
“All artists must learn the art of surviving loss: loss of hope, loss of face, loss of money, loss of self-belief.” – Julia Cameron, THE ARTIST’S WAY.
In November of last year, my widowed mother was diagnosed with mid-stage Alzheimer’s. In January, she required a full-time caregiver in her home. In late February, she suffered a psychotic breakdown and had to be admitted to a secure facility. Thanks to a change in medication, she has come back around but her memory is deteriorating rapidly. In some ways, she is not aware of losing track of minutes, days, weeks. For the rest of the family, it is sad and frustrating and stressful.
While cleaning out my mother’s house, I found a poem titled “Don’t Quit” that she had tucked into a drawer. Ironic, yes. Her mind is shutting down. Her eyesight is failing from cataracts and glaucoma. The neurologist is concerned that she is beginning to show signs of renal artery failure. And yet here is this scrap of paper with words of hope. I don’t know when she clipped it. Or from where. It could have been years ago. Maybe it helped her hang on this long. She’s 88 years old now. Her mother was only 62 when she had died of complications from Alzheimer’s.
When I decided to share the poem in my blog this month, I discovered that it ties in nicely with Debra Mullin’s blog entry on yesterday’s A Slice of Orange, in which agent/author Lucienne Diver states: “Don’t give up and don’t let rejection get you down. Rejection is part of the process. . . . you’ll never make it to the goal if you get disheartened and stop along the way. “
Don’t Quit
When things go wrong, as they sometimes will
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill
When the funds are low and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh
When care is pressing you down a bit
Rest if you must, but don’t you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns
As every one of us sometimes learns
And many a fellow turns about
When he might have won, had he stuck it out.
Don’t give up though the pace seems slow
You may succeed with another blow.
Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man;
Often the struggler has given up
When he might have captured the victor’s cup;
And he learned too late when the night came down
How close he was to the golden crown.
Success is failure turned inside out
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt
And you never can tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit
It’s when things seem worst that you mustn’t quit.
– Author Unknown
Until next month . . .
– Gillian Doyle
http://www.gilliandoyle.blogspot.com/
http://www.gilliandoyle.com/
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